Things that sound dirty at Thanksgiving but aren't:

- Whew, that's one terrific spread!

- I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.

- Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.

- Talk about a huge breast!

- It's Cool Whip time!

- If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!

- Are you ready for seconds yet?

- Are you going to come again next time?

- It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?

- Just wait your turn, you'll get some!

- Don't play with your meat.

- Just spread the legs open & stuff it in.

- Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?

- I didn't expect everyone to come at once!

- You still have a little bit on your chin.

- Use a nice smooth stroke when you whip it.

- How long will it take after you stick it in?

- You'll know it's ready when it pops up.

- Wow, I didn't think I could handle all of that!

- How many are coming?

- That's the biggest one I've ever seen!

- Just lay back & take it easy...I'll do the rest.

- How long do I beat it before it's ready?